As one door closes… I really want the other to open… NOW.

You know when you enter a new stage in your life, everything that you felt before slowly starts to become that fading effect in photoshop in your brain? I recently wrote a post where I’m Carrie from Sex and the City where I enjoy dating but I want a serious relationship? Yeah, well I actually hate dating now and I just want to go straight into a relationship and that’s not realistic.

I think its because I’m such an impatient person that I jump into things wanting the results now and with relationships you can’t really do that without getting burned. You have to enjoy the stage of talking, the getting to know you followed with dating and casual hangouts and you never can put a time limit to how long that will take and I think that’s where I ruin relationships but like I said, I’m super impatient.

I remember dating and talking to this guy I met in Cleveland for three maybe four months and I was getting impatient because I was constantly asking myself when things would progress. I was ready for the relationship to take that step into actually becoming a relationship and when I brought that up after four months of dating, he ghosted me. I didn’t understand what happened, where things went wrong. We were vibin’, hell he even talked about us being in a relationship multiple times but when push comes to shove and I push, he goes MIA?

Finally after letting him ghost me for almost a WEEK, I wrote him and was like okay, obviously this is an issue and we want different things by your actions and you being MIA, I just need to hear you say it. What the hell is this? Are we doing this or are we not? And of course he gave me a lame excuse, which actually he didn’t give me an excuse at all because I would ‘argue’ against it. I’m like bro, you’re 28 and you’re acting like an adolescent 14 year-old fuck boy.

But don’t people need a push to help them make that step that they’re afraid to take? But also if you ‘push’ somebody, does that also ruin the step into taking it to the next level? Am I being too pushy?

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